Good afternoon sisters and fellow Sports Widows. More Big Bash followed by another game of Big Bash followed by Australia playing someone in cricket. When will the torture end. In between the Big bash this week His Highness has been channel hopping to the tennis. Ohh to be at the tennis live rather than snippets in between cricket, more importantly living it up in Melbourne instead of having to stay up and listen to the drivel coming from our TV room.
Happy New Year Ladies and fellow Sports Widows. I hope you all had a wonderful break over the Christmas and New Year period. I certainly did, until …. Boxing Day. I woke up bright and early to a beautiful day on the Gold Coast, opened the blinds to a groan from His Highness – “what time is it” he jeered. I said “6.15am – time for a run and a swim”. To his credit, he raised and everything was looking great until 9am when I suggested we get ready for the beach. “You’ve got to be kidding!!! The Boxing Day test is about to start and the start of the Sydney to Hobart is on.” I pushed myself down to the pool with my book and started working on remedying this situation for The New Year. It is fair to say that my New Year’s resolutions will make His Highness very unhappy!!!! More on that next week.
Good afternoon girls. This will be my last newsletter for the year, unless of course His Highness commits some act of anti-greatness. (might be in touch again next week) So I bid you farewell until the New Year. I have added a photo of him at his best on the sauce at some sports event – my view is it is at some strip club in the Valley – hardly sport. I present to you below some of the low points of my year as the Widow to a Monday’s expert, sports buffoon and a regular invitee to racing and sports events by Corporate Bookmakers!!!!! (the idiot thinks they invite him for entertainment) Here goes:
Good afternoon girls. What a weekend. I went to Noosa with some mates. Went to lunch Saturday, a walk in Noosa national Park both mornings and the beach after that. Plenty to look at on the beach in between reading my book and having a swim. It was at the beach I got one of the great tips from one of my girlfriends.
Good afternoon girls. My afternoon of bliss was shattered when His Highness returned home from The Gabba at 4.30 in a state I would describe as messy or happy hysteria or the better description – pissed. He could see the brief disappointment on my face and duly explained that I should be happy because “firstly I did not ring you to pick me up and secondly I bought you some flowers on the way home”. He then produced a bunch of half dead, second rate flowers with the Seven Eleven Logo on the plastic with a sale sign - $4 special today only. I said “thank you for not ringing me to pick you up because I have no doubt I would have had to pick you up at 2.30 – given it must have taken you 2 hours to walk the 2km home from The Gabba.” I then promptly threw the flowers in the bin.
Good afternoon girls. Just when I thought the sports frenzy was dying down after the Spring Carnival the worst of the worst has come upon me. Cricket, not just any cricket but Test cricket. My disdain for cricket is unparalleled – it would put a glass eye to sleep.In fact I would rather watch re runs of Seinfeld. The only saving grace is that The Australians are getting beaten with ease so not 5 days of torture. Then yesterday I got even worse news – an email from The K Man that the Australian Golf season starts today. What have I done to deserve this sports cyclone.
Good afternoon girls. I missed you all last week. I was down at Derby Day on the Saturday then to the Mornington Peninsula on Cup Day, a shopping day on Wednesday to get a new dress and accompanying accessories for Oaks Day – backed the $100 winner in The Oaks then back home Saturday afternoon the week later. His Highness complained about not backing a winner, tough luck mate!!!
Good afternoon girls. So much for cashing up for the races on Saturday. Thursday night racing at Cranbourne was as His Highness would call it “a washout”. Ever confident he states “well off to Moonee Valley tomorrow night to cash up”. Friday night comes around and the usual rigmorale – doing the form, getting his beer cold and last but not least setting the channels so that he can hit back on the remote to jump between Racing.com and Sky Thoroughbred Live. Jeez Louise!!
Good afternoon girls. Apologies for the delay in this week’s Sports Widow. I had a week only surpassed by His Highness every week. Mud Crab Lunch on Wednesday at The Story Bridge then a Smart Pups Charity lunch at The Norman hosted by Andrew Ford. Tired, grumpy and worried about the weekend ahead. Yes, I am off to the track tomorrow with His Highness and no doubt some of his mates whom don’t bring their wives/partners. (for those of them who still have partners)
Good afternoon girls. The weekend was fraught with peril with “The Weekend of Brando Birthday Celebrations” as His Highness called it. Well it certainly was – Friday for lunch then kid’s pickup from school and then dinner with his stars (aka kids) at some Mexican joint – no doubt a few Coronas. Saturday was about the 4 Group 1’s at Caulfield and more cans. I said to His Highness I would take him shopping on Sunday morning for his birthday but upon his awakening he stated that he was not feeling well. So I said “maybe later”.